Happiness

Happiness is on of those things we long to obtain so very much. We spend endless amounts of time looking for it, and usually find it unexpectedly. Even as we grow up our parents often seem so much more interested in our happiness than our other aspects, with questions like “how was your day?” or “how are your friends?” because friends are one of the main aspects of happiness during our schooling time. And we all know that school is the first step in our life, we have heard that line over and over during those pain filled years, the one that goes “you have to study hard so you can get good marks, get a good job and have a good life.” Some of the time we just believed that. But for much of the time we realize that we would rather just fall in love, and make enough money and have enough time to have a barbeque or go fishing with some mates, enjoying a happiness that is far from consistent but is well worth the struggle. After all when we settle into that beer at the local, or come home to our loving family and we are asked “How was your day?” we aren’t going to reply “It was fantastic, I worked a bunch of overtime, got plenty of money, and lined up some more work for the weekend.” we will know we are happy, at least for the moment and reply “It’s going great now that I’m here.”

Cups and Mugs

We are engulfed in rituals, routines and procedures many of which are pointless, from such an early age, that we come to accept them, rarely questioning their importance or use. One great example of this is the use of cups and mugs. We have a glass of orange juice, a cup of cordial, and a mug with tea or coffee. Plastic cups for kids who drop glasses, but glasses are cups. And when it comes to the consumption of liquid, it doesn’t matter what we drink it out of, yet when we heat up the kettle we reach for a mug, and when we pull it from the fridge we reach for a cup. The cups and mugs are usually the same temperature. They each also have positions in which you can drink them, we can walk talk and casually sip from our cups, but we can hunch over our mugs, holding them in two hands breathing in the vapors as though they warm our spirit through a cold low mood. Juice in a mug, even a portable one, seems somehow silly, as does tea or coffee in a glass. We can walk with our tea or coffee but we pause to drink, we can sit and relax or refresh with our juice but we hold it with one hand and give it no praise. But we seem to have stopped asking ourselves ‘Why’ don’t we drink juice from a mug, simply because ‘we never have, it’s always been this way.’

Breakfast

We are always being told what to eat. (to get healthy – eat fruit and veg, to loose weight – eat less, to increase memory – eat fish, to get curly hair – eat your crusts, to feel better – eat chocolate (although fruit is more effective.)) And how important breakfast is, apparently it is the most important meal of the day, we should have whatever type of cereal or toast that is being advertised with a glass of fruit juice or actual fruit. It will help us concentrate, get up and ready to go, and have energy for the day. So when we skip breakfast and have a coffee instead, we know that’s why we are running out of energy by the first smoko. But what to have for breakfast when the day is half over? Is it still breakfast when we have it at midday, (McDonalds serves it until 11.) what about after that thought ‘Today is not going well, I want to start it again.’ Does the day go better when it restarts with a ‘good’ breakfast even though there is no real need to eat again. But naturally all these questions about second breakfast are only there as a distraction from the question its all about, ‘How much can repeating the morning ritual (at whatever time of the day it is) actually fix a ruined day?’

The Truth

In the last ‘episode’ (episode used as in psychotic rather than as serial) there were some Facts that some people may have found disturbing. All apologies for reality, but that’s the way it is. There are of course circumstances in which we do not want to know the truth, we say we do because we feel anxious like we are worrying too much thinking about what it could be, but really if we knew we would wish that we did not. For example we know that most people will not help people in need if there is discomfort in it for them. We deny this, but we do know it. (‘How many times has someone screamed in agony and got no response although they were perfectly within earshot of people?’) It’s been tested (by agonizing teens over and over again.) Then there is the question of “What happened?” and while we feel we must know what has caused someone who is obviously suffering such discomfort, and feel it may be good to get it off their chest, we do not feel comfortable as listeners to stories of attempted suicide in those we care about, nor would many of us feel comfortable talking about sexual abuse with a pre-teen who is talking about their own experience. Do we really need to know the truth, do we even actually want to?

Good Guy, Bad Guy

From the time we are tiny all forms of popular media tell us that there are good guys and bad guys, TV, comics, movies, books, fairy tales even games, (the influence is so strong that we sometimes feel uneasy around people who ‘look’ like ‘bad guys’) from jack and the beanstalks - Jack vs. Giant, wizard of OZ – Dorothy vs. The Wicked Witch of the west, batman and robin – batman vs. the riddler, superman – superman vs. Lex Luther, cops and robbers – cops vs. robbers, right up to the news where we see flicks of murderers, arsonists, police, ambos and drug dealers, prompting us to teach our kids “Stranger Danger” (News Flash for the Happily Ignorant:) We know most first time drug users get drugs from friends or siblings and the majority of the violence is domestic and that most pedophiles are trusted people we know well, if not even family members. But of course we have already decided that these perpetrators are the ‘good guys’ and ‘good guys’ just don’t do that.